Sunday Laughs: 20 Faith-Based Jokes to Brighten a Rainy Day
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Sunday Laughs: 20 Faith-Based Jokes to Brighten a Rainy Day
Today is Sunday. There’s light rain tapping the windows, Tucker’s off doing his thing, and it’s just me sitting here with a cup of coffee… stuck inside, alone, needing a little pick-me-up.
So I did what any reasonable woman would do on a gloomy day:
I asked my partner G to tell me some jokes — and oh boy… he delivered.
If you need a smile today, here are the 20 jokes he gave me.
I hope you enjoy them as much as we did.
1. The Prayer Mix-Up
A little boy prayed loudly in church,
"Dear God, please make me a good boy… but if You can’t, it’s okay — I like the way I am!"
2. The Pastor’s Trip
The pastor asked, “Who wants to go to Heaven?”
Everyone raised their hand except one man.
“Brother, don’t you want to go to Heaven when you die?”
“Oh! When I die? I thought you meant today… I still gotta do laundry.”
3. God’s Sense of Humor
A woman prayed, “Lord, why did You make men so clueless?”
God replied, “So women would have something to fix.”
4. The Random Bible Flip
A man asked God for a sign and opened his Bible at random:
“Judas went and hanged himself.”
He flipped again:
“Go thou and do likewise.”
He whispered, “Okay… maybe I’ll ask again tomorrow.”
5. The Lawn Miracle
A wife said, “Faith can move mountains!”
Her husband nodded, “Good. Can your faith move the lawnmower back into the garage?”
6. The Honest Kid
Sunday school teacher: “Where is God?”
Little boy: “In the bathroom.”
Teacher: “What makes you think that?”
Boy: “Because every morning my dad bangs on the door and yells, ‘Good Lord, are you STILL in there?!’”
7. The Coffee Confession
Pastor: “Confess your sins.”
Woman: “I drink too much coffee.”
Pastor: “That’s not a sin.”
Woman: “It is when you hide cups around the house so no one knows how much.”
8. Heavenly Math
Child: “Mom, is God everywhere?”
Mom: “Yes.”
Child: “Then He saw me steal that cookie?”
Mom: “Yes.”
Child: “Well… that’s awkward.”
9. Church Sign Wisdom
“Looking for a sign from God?
This is it.”
—Every church marquee ever
10. The Loud Prayer
Man kneels and says, “Lord, give me patience.”
His wife shouts from the kitchen, “Ask for strength too — you’re gonna need it!”
11. The Baptism Surprise
Pastor: “Do you accept Jesus?”
Man: “Yes!”
Pastor: “Do you reject Satan?”
Man: “Well… that depends. Does rejecting him mean I can’t go back to my ex?”
12. The Faith Workout
A woman told her friend, “I started a new workout routine called ‘Daniel Fast Cardio.’”
Friend: “What’s that?”
Woman: “Running from bread.”
13. The Choir Problem
Choir director: “Everyone sing with your heart!”
One man sings loudly… and off-key.
Director whispers, “Maybe sing with your heart… and your inside voice.”
14. Heavenly Help Desk
Man: “Lord, I’m drowning in bills!”
God: “Stop ordering things at 3 AM.”
Man: “…Fair enough.”
15. Sunday School Logic
Teacher: “Why do we bow our heads to pray?”
Child: “So God can hear us better.”
Teacher: “Where did you learn that?”
Child: “My grandma — she bows before yelling at everyone too.”
16. Bible Study Panic
Woman: “I love Bible study.”
Friend: “What’s your favorite book?”
Woman: “The one with the sticky note that says ‘read this chapter before class.’”
17. The Blessing Mixup
A man sneezes loudly.
His wife says, “Bless you.”
He replies, “Thank you.”
Alexa suddenly says, “You’re welcome.”
They both freeze.
Alexa adds, “…God is good.”
They unplug Alexa.
18. Holy Motivation
Pastor: “God loves a cheerful giver.”
Man tosses bill in offering plate and mutters, “Then He’s gonna be thrilled with this one.”
19. The Honest Grandma
Grandma at church luncheon:
“Who made this casserole?”
Someone says proudly, “I did!”
Grandma nods…
“God gives everyone different gifts.”
20. Church Parking Lot Truth
Husband: “Honey, you cut that person off in the parking lot!”
Wife: “I know. And? God forgives.”
Husband: “Yes, but the church security team saw.”
Wife: “…That’s a different problem.”